SYNOPSIS
I never thought I would end up in a Tokyo bondage bar when my wedding got cancelled. But when my fiancé abruptly left, just five weeks before the Big Day, my seemingly #blessed life crumbled. And like a second stab to my freshly oozing wound, my younger sister also got engaged (double sentencing me as a failed woman in the eyes of Indonesian society). So I did what any broken-hearted millennial would do: I got on Tinder and embarked on a breakup rebound journey to rediscover myself, one swipe at a time.
In pursuit of the science of rebound, I analyzed modern romance with my analytical Googler mind. I said hell yes to every single chance to escape Jakarta, its traffic, and my family terrorizing my love life. And when my neverending Tech work sent me places (from San Francisco to Tokyo, Lombok, NYC, and Singapore), I went YOLO. I set myself up for a (pseudo) scientific romantic experimentation and swiped right on:
The Neuroscientist, who taught me how to remove traumatic memories
The introverted Film Director, who showed me the art of being alone
The ex-Googler who introduced me to Tokyo’s BDSM world
The psychedelic-loving Porn Star
...and the divorced dad, to whom I finally opened my heart again.
As each encounter turned into a chapter, I reflected on my own romantic ideals, explored my sexuality as a Muslim woman, and observed the often gloomy state of modern-day romance (with all its dick pic pick up lines). All while I juggled the Asian societal pressure at every family gathering until I mastered the perfect response to “When are you getting married?”.
This is a memoir for those who have loved, lost and struggled with #adulting as they mend their broken hearts, those with an install/uninstall relationship with Tinder/Bumble/Hinge, and those who are simply trying to figure out what it means to be a single 30-something woman in this day and age.